I have been single, without dating anyone, since 1998. I had what I considered an amazing relationship and without consciously deciding on whether to do so or not, I just stopped being aware of the possibility. I made excuses about my health, my brother’s care, my business being too time consuming, I never met anyone who interested me in that way, I wanted to concentrate on developing my projects, and every other excuse I could muster when asked why I never dated.
I actually don’t remember meeting anyone I would have wanted to date. Yes, my standards are higher than they were when I was in my 20’s, 30’s and 40’s, but the core issue had more to do with my interpretation of what it takes to be in a relationship.
I hear people say, “Relationships are hard work!”
I don’t think they need to be when both are on the same page. If a couple knows they are both working with the same purpose in mind, even when they are going in different directions, it isn’t hard work, its having a single purpose taking different routes. It has to do with respecting each other enough to know each person has the right to decide for themselves how they get there. What is effective for him, usually doesn’t work for her and vice a versa. And that should be okay! No one can be you and no one should try to force another person to be like them.
Its knowing the person you love and care about has to work through things in the way they are most comfortable.