Attached to Material Objects: Them: Yes _ No __
This is not as cut-and-dry it might seem. One reason is that I really enjoy my personal possessions, but on the other hand, I don’t know if I’d be that upset if I lost them.
People who cling to their possessions usually have a major void in their life or they hide behind the possessions to avoid any in depth connections.
This is not to suggest that you should still be using apple crates for bookshelves rather than collecting meaningful possessions. I love creating a warm nurturing home environment where my friends and family feel free to drop by.
Them: Yes ___ No ___
There are a couple of close friends that I like to do things with and I feel like I have to save up my energy prior to being with either one of them. They are talkers. They talk about things that I don’t find the least bit stimulating, like a blow-by-blow account of their last shopping trip.
They are both very dear people, but I found myself putting off our time together on more than one occasion. If you’re not a talkative person, someone who is can be an energy drain.
It’s hard to find that balance with couples. But if there isn’t some sense of balance, it will wear on each of you. I enjoy the author, John Gray’s “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus” concept of men needing to retreat to their cave when they come in from a day’s work. While women find satisfaction in detailing every step of the day. Again, even though that is a generalization, he points out the vast difference in communication requirements between men and women.
I personally marvel that you could take two individuals who were raised in completely different households, communities and even states and find ample commonality between them to warrant their believing that they could live harmoniously in one household. Then add the fact that one is female while the other is male, it’s truly amazing!